The Critic Turns Four

We now break with your regularly scheduled reviews, raves, rants, and random excerpts to celebrate a little birthday.

Yes, dear reader, as of today, The Barenaked Critic — at least, its current incarnation — is four years old.


I was looking for a picture of a cake, but let’s face it: this is so much more appropriate. Cheers!

Admittedly, it’s only been in the past year and a half that I’ve really made a concerted effort to keep the site updated with something that ISN’T my old movie reviews, but still. Four years is like being middle-aged in Internet time.

Over the course of that time, I’ve written 137 blog posts (including this one) and had more than 8,000 views. Maybe they aren’t earth-shattering numbers, but it’s nice to see there are a few other people out there who have enjoyed this, at least a little bit.

To celebrate, here are a few stats from the past four years:

My first real post:

The Barenaked Archives: A Lot Like Love

I think maybe five people actually read it.

Most viewed post:

The Netflix Queue: White Collar

White Collar - Neal Caffrey (Matt Bomer) and Peter Burke (Tim DeKay) - photo credit NBC Universal

You knew this was coming.

Most commented post:

July #WriteMotivation: Week 2 Check-in

Apparently everybody loves Terry Pratchett.

Most views in a day:

February 20, 2012 – The Critic Does Twilight

And apparently everybody either loves or hates Twilight.

Most popular search terms:

barenaked critic – 238 views
domino – 128 views
white collar season 3 netflix – 82 views
white collar season 3 on netflix – 56 views
elizabethtown – 45 views
the gentlemen – 35 views

If I had $5 for every time somebody landed on my site for something related to White Collar or a naked actor, I could pay off my house.

Most random search terms:

Considering that I have “barenaked” in my title tag AND my URL, and I have about 800 various actors tagged throughout the posts, I’m going to discount every search term that involves somebody looking for nude pictures of actors and actresses. Because frankly, with that much stacked against me, I don’t think they really count as “random” anymore.

However, I’ve still collected some interesting ones:

“edgar rice burroughs real uncle”
Yes. John Carter was real. Watch the feed from Curiosity; it’ll run across him and Dejah Thoris any day now.

“lincoln high school softball award ceremony at la bellas”

Wow. That is AMAZINGLY specific.

“corpse bride naked”
Okay, I lied about not including anything with “naked” in the search. Because, Corpse Bride? REALLY? o.O

“facepalm reader”
Somebody with the ability to say exactly what you did to deserve this:

Double Facepalm! Now with Picard and Riker!

“animation film never open forbidden door with skeliton key evil black”

I searched this myself and ended up here. Why they came to my site instead of TV Tropes, I have no idea.

“ferret on chrystal meth”
I am actually THRILLED somebody found my site by searching this phrase.

“does brendan gleeson have a prosthetic leg?”
Yes, and he only drinks from a flask he keeps at his hip and he has a fake eye.

“+voodoo +man +hair +feathers +bird +witch +louisiana +movie”

Who is: the villain from my 2011 NaNo novel?

“how and to what extent do the use of detail and description support themes and ideas in the movie howl’s moving castle, and help move the story forward.”
Good luck on your paper. I hope you weren’t waiting till the last minute to research because, let’s face it, my review ain’t gonna help.

“making love hot no clothes lesbian”

You were so disappointed, weren’t you?

Thank you, everybody, for coming and hanging out with me. I hope the next four years are just as much fun as the last four have been.


This one’s for you!

Beer picture by Bernt Rostad


2 comments on “The Critic Turns Four

  1. I find the ferret search so EXTREMELY appropriate! *giggle*

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