So you guys remember a few weeks ago when I found the chapter-by-chapter read-through of Fifty Shades of Grey, courtesy Jennifer Armintrout?
Well, in my online adventures (read: “procrastinating while reading the comments sections of old Smart Bitches blog posts”), I came across a link to this Tumblr blog: Reasoning with Vampires.
Essentially, this brave soul is doing LINE EDITS of the entire Twilight saga. Yes, including the novella and the unpublished Midnight Sun. Right now, she’s in the midst of Eclipse, but (because I don’t have anything better to do, right?) I got into the archives and started at the beginning. Which was July 2010.
It’s like CANDY. Delicious, OCD-happy grammar candy.
In one of my novels, I will include the line “a flock of sugar gliders battering recklessly against the walls of my stomach” because of this.
There are some comments she makes that I don’t agree with (I’m a lot more lenient about the number of sentence fragments in the story, for example), but by and large it’s a hilarious and illuminating look at the books. I’m picking up new grammar and style related stuff almost as much as I’m laughing out loud at my computer.
Which means my productivity has been shot to hell. Ah well.
Header image and thumbnail photograph by Hugh Lee and licensed under CC BY-SA 2.0.
1) Finish August Buzz articles by July 13.
The movies are about halfway done; the weird news is only just started. Hoping to make more headway on both tonight, especially the weird news. Although there are a lot more movies coming out this month than I anticipated.
On a related note, if you guys find any stupid criminal stories, send ‘em my way. Even if I don’t use them this month, I can use them next month.
2) Read 1 book a week.
Hahaha! So far I’ve read:
Her Best Worst Mistake by Sarah Mayberry
Firelight by Kristen Callihan
Changeless by Gail Carriger
Dracula by Bram Stoker (started it ages ago, finished this weekend!)
As well as five romance novellas, three of which were in an anthology I purchased last week.
My name is Michelle and I’m a book addict. “Hi, Michelle!”
3) Update blog twice a week.
So far, so good: three updates last week, plus one so far this week. I’ve got a review of Firelight mostly written, and I will have my thoughts up on Dracula sometime soon.
How has your July been so far? Anybody seen the new Spider-Man movie? (That’s also on the to-do list somewhere.)
LOL. I too am a book addict. Luckily, I’ve been too busy pounding out my own novel to read much. That being said, I am going to have to check out that blog you mentioned. That sounds hilarious and informative…which is the best way to learn in my book.
Good luck with your goals and stop procrastinating, you can totally do all this! 
“Hilarious and informative” is a great way to describe RwV. I’ve bookmarked a few of the posts that fall under the “informative/educational” side. I may post those here at some point.
And thank you!
Ok, so, reading that one line edit as me sort of contemplating reading the Twilight series. OMG did I just say that?! No freaking way! Um, where’s the soap so I can wash my mouth out!
Anyway, congrats on your goals! It’s awesome progress! YAY! I wish I could read so fast!
Hey, read it if you want! I did made it through the first book, but the excerpt from New Moon in the back of Twilight made me wall-banging angry, so I don’t think I’ll read the rest of the series. For my blood pressure’s sake.
Although part of me wants to read Breaking Dawn for the sheer WTFery involving sex and vampire babies.
Well, reading is supposed to be for entertainment, right? So I guess reading Twilight for a few laughs is counted as entertainment…
Your goals are looking fantastic! I used to be a book addict, but now I’m just a picky bitch lol
Haha, I picked easy goals this month! After 3 months solid of “I’m going to finish this draft come hell or high water,” I needed a break.
My roommate’s insanely picky as well. She uses me as a sifter for books because I’m a lot more patient than she is. “This one’s good, this one doesn’t get good till about 50 pages in, you can skip to here in this one and not miss anything…”
Go you on your goals!: )
Thank you!
I love the Twilight edits. I’m almost done with my own edits right now, so it hit a nerve (a funny bone, actually!) Glad your #writemotivation goals are coming along so nicely this month!
I am actually going to have that Tumblr open when I go back through my own draft in a couple of weeks. (“SENTENCES ARE NOT MINI-VANS. BAD CRITIC. NO COOKIE.”)
Finally got started on my own #writemotivation goals for this month. heh Tweaking programs is so much fun! /sarcasm It’s because of those grammar error that I don’t try to read Twilight, though mine aren’t much better. (blush)
Glad to see you’re further on in your goals than I am.
Some of what she (the lady behind RwV) points out in Twilight are the poor word choices. It’s not that it’s the WRONG word — it technically means what the author wants — but it’s not the PERFECT word.
One of the best pieces of writing advice I’ve ever read is this: Intend every word you write. And reading RwV just hammered that idea home.